A Personal Update on My Health, My Family, and the Journey Ahead

First and foremost, I want to say thank you for being here. Whether you’ve known me for decades, followed my journey over the years, worked with me, or we’ve only recently connected, I’m grateful you’re taking a few minutes to read this.

I have some important news to share about my health, the journey ahead, and some changes I’m making over the coming weeks and months.

Many of you know my story, but for those who don’t, I want to share a little background.

Where It All Began

In October 2015, I was diagnosed with stage 4 non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.

Cancer was throughout my body. I had fluid accumulating in my lungs and abdomen, and I was facing an incredibly serious situation.

From an oncology standpoint, the prognosis was not encouraging. The doctors I was working with had limited treatment options to offer, and the possibility that cancer would eventually take my life was very real.

But Caroline and I weren’t willing to simply accept that there was nothing else to explore.

We started researching, asking questions, reaching out to people around the world, and learning everything we could about conventional treatments, complementary approaches, nutrition, and different perspectives on health and healing.

Over the following months, I experienced more than I could possibly summarize here.

Chemotherapy. Immunotherapy. Different therapies and approaches. Traveling internationally in pursuit of answers. Meeting extraordinary people. Learning things I never imagined I would need to know.

And approximately 15 months after my initial diagnosis, I received a clear PET scan.

No detectable cancer.

It was an incredible moment.

But about seven months later, the cancer returned.

Once again, I was facing stage 4 lymphoma, this time with three areas of involvement.

I remember thinking I had already done everything imaginable. I genuinely believed I had overcome this chapter of my life.

So what now?

That second experience changed something in me.

It was during that season that I began exploring consciousness, the mind-body connection, emotional well-being, childhood conditioning, our subconscious beliefs, and the relationship between our inner experiences and the way we live.

I became fascinated with questions I had never really considered before.

Why do we believe we’re not good enough?
Why do we carry certain fears throughout our lives?
How much of what we experience today is connected to things we learned or experienced decades ago?
What does it actually mean to heal?

That exploration completely transformed my understanding of myself, my relationships, my purpose, and the world.

By April 2018, I had another clear PET scan.

And for more than eight years, I lived without any known recurrence of cancer.

Those years have been extraordinary.

I’ve gotten to watch my children grow up, celebrate 26 years of marriage with Caroline, travel, coach, teach, build relationships, move our family to Ecuador, and experience so much of the beauty life has to offer.

And I don’t take a single bit of it for granted.

What’s Happening Now

About a year and a half ago, our family went through an incredibly difficult season involving business, financial challenges, and some painful experiences involving people close to us.

It was stressful in ways that are difficult to fully describe.

During that time, I also experienced significant eczema and walking pneumonia. We pursued testing and worked with healthcare practitioners, especially given my medical history.

Eventually, those health issues resolved.

And interestingly, that difficult season also played a role in our decision to move to Ecuador.

What an incredible gift that decision has been.

Since arriving here, I’ve genuinely felt healthier, happier, more connected, and more alive than I had in years.

I’ve been exercising, hiking, playing and teaching pickleball, coaching people, making wonderful friendships, and enjoying our new life.

Then, approximately a month ago, I developed what seemed like a cold with a cough.

Not long afterward, I noticed some swelling around my neck.

Eventually, I realized there was a swollen lymph node, something I was familiar with from my previous experiences with lymphoma.

After Caroline returned from traveling, we discussed it and decided I needed to get it checked.

I also spoke with Dr. Teshna here in Vilcabamba, who encouraged me to pursue further evaluation.

Over the past week, I’ve been to Loja, met with doctors, and undergone imaging, including a CT scan, chest X-ray, and ultrasound.

Unfortunately, the findings have raised serious concerns about cancer being present in my body again.

We’re continuing the medical evaluation, including additional blood work and oncology consultations, to establish the full picture and determine exactly what we’re dealing with.

I’ll share the specific medical findings and documentation here as they’re confirmed.

The imaging and test results so far are on the Medical Imaging & Test Results section of the home page.

So Where Do We Go From Here?

For those who know me, you probably won’t be surprised by my approach.

I’m going to be curious.
I’m going to be open.

I’m going to ask questions, explore possibilities, seek knowledgeable guidance, and give myself every reasonable opportunity to get well.

I’m already meeting with medical doctors, naturopathic practitioners, and Ayurveda practitioners. I’ve been referred to an oncologist and am pursuing further testing.

We’re also exploring nutrition, appropriate supplements, lifestyle changes, rest, supportive therapies, and ways to care for my emotional and psychological well-being.

I’m bringing together people I trust and practitioners who can help me evaluate my options, including evidence-based cancer treatments.

One of the most meaningful aspects of this experience so far has been the emotional work.

I’ve already begun exploring some deeply painful experiences from the past couple of years and recognizing feelings and patterns I hadn’t fully processed.

I personally believe our physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual experiences are deeply interconnected.

I don’t pretend to know precisely what causes every illness, and I certainly don’t believe people should blame themselves for becoming sick.

But I do believe there’s tremendous value in becoming more conscious of what’s happening within us.

And regardless of what role those experiences may or may not play in physical disease, the emotional work I’m doing has already been incredibly meaningful.

Why I’m Stepping Away for a While

There’s something I’ve become very clear about.

For this next season, I need to put myself first. Completely.

Not my business.
Not my coaching clients.
Not pickleball.
Not social media.
Not messages, notifications, responsibilities, or the constant demands of everyday life.

Me.

My health. My body. My mind. My heart. My spirit.

Beginning sometime during the first week of November, I’m planning to spend approximately 35 days staying with a friend who has a peaceful space where I can dedicate myself to rest and healing.

I’ll be following a carefully considered protocol, working with practitioners, nourishing my body, and spending time in reflection, meditation, and whatever else feels supportive during this process.

Most importantly, I’ll be completely unplugging from my phone and the outside world.

No social media.
No calls.
No texts.
No WhatsApp.
No emails.
No coaching.
No constantly checking to see what’s happening.

I’ll still be nearby, and Caroline and the kids will be able to visit and spend time with me.

But for those five or six weeks, I’m going to give myself something I don’t think I’ve ever truly given myself before.

My complete, undivided attention.

I’m planning to pause my life coaching for at least six weeks and my pickleball lessons throughout November and December.

My hope is to return to the court, my clients, and the work I love sometime in January, depending on how things unfold.

Until then, if you reach out to me and don’t hear back, please don’t take it personally.

I’m not ignoring you.

I’m simply choosing to be fully present with myself during this experience.

Caroline, Our Kids, and Our Family

Of course, one of the hardest parts of all of this has been talking with our children.

We’ve had conversations with our three older kids, Addison, Atlanta, and Arthur.

Those conversations aren’t easy.

It doesn’t matter how much you’ve learned about life, consciousness, acceptance, or the nature of existence.

You’re still human.
You still have a heart.
You still love your family more than words can describe.

And some experiences are simply difficult.

With our youngest, Arrow, who turns five on November 11, we’re choosing not to share specific medical details at this point.

He’s still so little, and we don’t feel it’s necessary to introduce something he wouldn’t really understand unless circumstances make that conversation appropriate.

If you’re spending time around our family, please be especially mindful of what you say in front of Arrow.

We would really appreciate that.

And if you see Caroline or the kids around Vilcabamba, give them some love.

A hug.
A smile.
A little encouragement.

Just understand that everyone processes things differently, and we’re doing our best to navigate this together.

Caroline will continue working, caring for our family, and handling quite a bit while I step away.

We may not always have the capacity to respond to every message, but please know how much your love and kindness mean to us.

How You Can Support Us

One of the questions we’ve already been receiving from people who know what’s happening is how they can help.

And that’s one of the reasons we’re creating this website.

I want to be completely transparent.

Stepping away from my life coaching and pickleball lessons for several weeks, potentially longer, means our family will experience a significant reduction in income.

At the same time, we’re already incurring additional expenses through medical appointments, diagnostic testing, treatments, consultations, supportive therapies, and the healing program I’m putting together.

We don’t know exactly how long this journey will last.
We don’t know what the total financial impact will be.

And while Caroline will continue working, we’d be incredibly grateful for some additional financial support during this season.

If you’re in a position to contribute, there are several ways to do so through this website, including our fundraising page and direct donation options.

Whether it’s $10, $50, $100, or something else, every contribution will be appreciated.

And please, if you’re not in a position to contribute financially, I don’t want you to feel even the slightest obligation.

There are so many other ways to show love.

If you’re local to Vilcabamba, there may be practical ways to help Caroline and the kids. A ride somewhere, help with the children, inviting Arrow over for a playdate, or simply checking in on the family.

Your prayers, good thoughts, encouragement, and love are welcome, too.

And if you have personal experiences, helpful resources, or ideas you believe might be useful, you’re welcome to share them through the contact information we provide.

Just know that we’re already exploring many different approaches and working with multiple practitioners. We won’t be able to review every suggestion or pursue every possibility.

We’re going to listen, learn, use discernment, and make the best decisions we can for our family.

One Thing I Really Want You to Understand

Please don’t feel sorry for me.

Seriously.

Love me. Love our family. Support us however you feel called.

But you don’t need to pity me.

And this isn’t because I’m pretending everything is easy or spiritually bypassing the reality of what’s happening.

This is serious.
It’s challenging.

There are difficult conversations, practical concerns, uncertainties, and emotions that come with an experience like this.

I feel all of that.

But here’s something I’ve learned.

Nobody gets through life without facing challenges.

And I don’t believe we need to compare whose challenges are bigger, harder, or more painful.

Whatever you’re going through, you’re the one experiencing it.

And that matters.

I’m not somehow special because I’m navigating cancer.

I’m a human being having a human experience, just like everyone else.

And from my perspective, there’s something profoundly beautiful about that.

What I Believe About Life and Healing

My perspective on life today is radically different from what it was when I first received my diagnosis in 2015.

I don’t see myself as merely this physical body.

I experience myself as something far greater.

A timeless, limitless, boundless expression of consciousness.
The divine temporarily experiencing life through this human being called Ryan.

I know that language may sound unusual to some people, and that’s perfectly okay.

It’s simply how I understand my existence today.

I believe there’s so much more to life than what we can see, touch, measure, or explain.

And that perspective has profoundly changed my relationship with fear, uncertainty, and even death.

Am I planning on dying anytime soon?

Absolutely not.

I have a wonderful wife, four extraordinary children, incredible friends, beautiful experiences still ahead of me, and so much more I want to contribute to this world.

I want to laugh.
I want to play pickleball.
I want to travel.
I want to watch my children grow.
I want to keep loving Caroline.
I want to coach, speak, write, share, teach, and help people discover greater freedom in their own lives.

I have every intention of being here for a very long time.

I genuinely believe I can navigate this and come out the other side healthier, stronger, wiser, and more alive than ever.

And at the same time, I recognize something important.

I don’t know exactly how this will unfold.
None of us really does.

We can make plans, take action, seek guidance, and do everything within our power to influence our circumstances.

But life is still bigger than any one of us.

And I’ve found tremendous peace in accepting that.

So I’m not approaching this experience as a battle against life.

I’m approaching it as an opportunity to care for myself more deeply than ever before, to remain open, and to meet whatever comes with as much love, courage, curiosity, and presence as I can.

What Happens Next?

For now, this website will serve as our central place for updates.

My son Addison is helping us put everything together, and we’ll provide information here about how to contribute financially, offer practical support, or contact Caroline when appropriate.

During my time offline, Caroline or Addison may share updates as they’re able.

You can check back here periodically to see how things are going.

Once I return from my time away, I hope to begin sharing more myself, whether through writing, videos, or eventually social media again.

And who knows what insights, realizations, and transformations might come from this chapter?

If there’s one thing my life has taught me, it’s that some of the most extraordinary things I’ve experienced have emerged from circumstances I never would have chosen.

I believe that can be true again.

I’m looking forward to more life.
More love.
More laughter.
More adventure.
More connection.
More of the simple joy of existing.

I truly believe there’s still so much ahead.

And in the meantime, I’m going to give myself permission to rest, to receive, to be supported, and to focus on what matters most.

Thank You

To everyone who has loved us, supported us, encouraged us, shared life with us, or simply taken a moment to read this:

Thank you.

I genuinely feel surrounded by extraordinary people.

I don’t take that lightly.

You don’t need to fix anything for me.
You don’t need to have the perfect words.
You don’t need to know what to say.

Just keep loving us.

That’s enough.

And if you feel called to support our family financially or practically during this time, we’re deeply grateful.

I really do believe that one day I’ll look back on this chapter as another extraordinary part of my journey, another opportunity to grow, to learn, to love, and to share something meaningful with others.

Until then, I’m going to do what I feel called to do.

Take care of myself.
Love my family.
Trust the process.
And keep living.